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Welcome to my blog. I never intended to use one of these but my brother has persuaded me to start one up. So I hope the thoughts which I convey to you will have some sort of impact or meaning as I share my feelings. Feel free to comment.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Not Quite Good Enough

Ah, isn't it the best feeling in the world when you feel like you've had a productive day? Man, I feel so relieved after just sitting down and doing the work that I need to do for school. I kicked off the day by receiving a phone call from a guy called Nish that woke me up, reminding me that he was here to pick me up to go the Salvation Army to help serve breakfast to the homeless in Merced (this is at 5:40am, I had gotten to sleep about 3 hours earlier after watching Se7en with some housemates). Anyway, I tried to make an excuse by saying I was still in bed and I just woke up (that was the truth). But he persisted and said he would wait, in which case I was like "Great." So I sucked it up threw on some pants and a beanie (yes I had a shirt on too) and headed out the door to meet him. Anyway, served breakfast from 630 till 8 o clock since Nish had a class at 9 to go to. I actually thanked him for not giving me a excuse to flake on him, which I really am thankful for. Serving others just plain makes you feel better because you know you helped someone out.

But as I thought about these kinds of things (feeding the homeless, volunteering at a soup kitchen or a food pantry, or just holding the door open for someone), why do we do it? Is it because we want to feel better about ourselves? Because it is personally rewarding? Because we love the people? Or is it because we want to be good enough for something? Whatever that something is may be different for you but I really believe the reason we do some of things is a mix of all the questions asked above. But mainly because we are trying to get good enough so that we can be considered an all around good person. But hey, there's nothing wrong with that! These are definitely noble reasons and they are things that good people do but isn't there more to it? I believe so.

If you believe in Christ or not, at one point or another it may cross your mind that you would never be good enough for God. You screw up all the time. You do terrible things. Why would this God want anything to do with me? I've said it before and I will say it again and again; the answer is simple...love. Jesus Christ lived a perfect life believe it or not and because God loved you that much, He sent His only son to die for you (you may be familiar with the verse John 3:16). Anyway, some people believe that if they live a "good enough" life that they will make it to whatever kind of afterlife they believe in (or lack thereof) when they pass away. But regardless of who you are, you can never live a good enough life, sorry to break it to you. It is in our very nature to be imperfect. Well so what? That God that you may imagine to be crazy far away and that you can never match up to isn't that far at all. He's right here, waiting for you. You will never be good enough, but He is always good to us. Get it in your head that He loves you passionately, something you can't comprehend and probably never will. So forget about trying to be good enough and just give your life to the One who gave His for you. Living your life for Him will give every kind act you do a little more meaning. It will shape your life and you will have a reason to do the things you don't quite understand why you do. Don't think that He sees a mess when He looks at you. God loves you for who you are and that is something you almost never see from people today. People love you only if you love them back. People give to you when you give to them. There are conditions to that love. That's where God differs. He loves you regardless of the mess you may be in but He looks past all of that and sees your heart. You are beautiful in His eyes. You are worth something.

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